Bruce Schneier goes on a rant in this month's Crypto-Gram: "Honestly, security experts don't pick on Microsoft because we have some fundamental dislike for the company. Indeed, Microsoft's poor products are one of the reasons we're in business. We pick on them because they've done more to harm Internet security than anyone else, because they repeatedly lie to the public about their products' security, and because they do everything they can to convince people that the problems lie anywhere but inside Microsoft." Amen, brother.

ZDNet: Win XP updates stopped by glitch. "Engineers are working to fix a glitch in a Microsoft Web server that has prevented Windows XP users from downloading software updates, including a patch for a security hole, a company spokeswoman said Monday." After reading this, my friend Eric said: "There's a hole in bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza…"

"He's a genetically engineered Amish vagrant haunted by memories of 'Nam. She's a transdimensional impetuous magician's assistant in the wrong place at the wrong time. They fight crime!"